Dec 29, 2020

Bathroom Dungeons: Tomb of the Sit Trap

I brought a sketchpad and a pen to the bathroom before when I... Anyway, have a dungeon! I'll call this series for Bathroom Dungeons because I'll draw them when I... Anyway, have a dungeon! And yeah, there are no rooms, and no keys, and no nothing, but I figured: maybe you can fill in the blanks when you got to the bathroom and... Anyway, have a dungeon!

Dec 25, 2020

Devil of Cat


God jul! Have a cat map. Random encounters in the comment section if you please.

Dec 19, 2020

The crappy life infuser

Cicely de Cairn is really bad at what she does, but at least it doesn't cost you an arm and a leg.

In short, she can bring that which is dead back to life.

But as stated above, she is really bad at it.

She used to call herself a NECROMANCER, because, she thought, she dealt with the dead and so. But then that became a bad thing, so she had to relocate, and give herself a new title.

So she started to call herself a UNDEAD UNDOER, because, she thought, she dealt with undoing death. But it turned out that attracted the wrong clientele; necromancers who regretted having created certain undead and now wished to restore those to some previous state.

The combination of having your front porch occupied by zombies, ghouls, skeletons and regretful, powerful necromancers with strange, geometric hats and short temper - and being terrible at your profession - turned out to be a tad too much for poor Cicely, so once again she had to relocate, and give herself a new title.

So she started to call herself a BAKER, just to give herself a break. That didn't last long, and left deeper scars in her consumers than those necromancers would've, so once again she relocated and gave herself a new title.

Her latest title is LIFE INFUSER. Having done at least some research, she is now certain that it won't attract the wrong type of clientele.

But, as previously stated, she is really bad at what she does. But she is kind - and will have a gathering of bugs running around her feet at all times. She doesn't have any permanent residence, and will most likely be encountered in the vicinity of any settlement.


Cicely de Cairn is able to resurrect that which has been dead for less than two days without any side effects - if, and only if, it is at most the size of a normal sized beetle.

Trying to resurrect anything larger than that will always result in one or more negative side effects.


Costs of resurrection

Cicely de Cairn is an interesting one; she doesn't know how to charge people for her services, but she do enjoy a show:

  1. "Present to me within a week's time a pig dressed up in attire stolen from a noble man. Return the attire afterwards."
  2. "Have a man chase you here so that I may witness it. He must be upset but not violent."
  3. "Come back here in two days, but you must all have switched clothes with each other, and you must pretend we haven't met."
  4. "Return with the largest egg you can find. You may only speak while the egg is in the air."
  5. "Escort a family consisting of no less than three people to me. You must not educate them of your matter here beforehand. They must come willingly. Afterward, escort them back safely."
  6. "When I start counting, go quickly and find yourself each a good hiding place. When I reach ten, I'll open my eyes and come looking for you. ONE..."


Duration of resurrection

Instant. The object rises as if been awoken from sleep. Beware: no wounds will be healed, nor will any limbs grow back.

Negative side effects

As previously stated, unless you're resurrecting a beetle or an ant, there will be negative side effects:

  1. Shift all ability scores visually one step down on the character sheet, e.g. Strength score becomes Dexterity, Dexterity becomes Constitution, and so on (Charisma becomes Strength)
  2. Drop six dice on the character sheet. Draw straight lines between the dice, forming an enclosed area. This is what the character has forgotten (including ability scores; treat them as 3). Any items within this area are unknown and scary to the character, and may not be used ever again (not even its kind, i.e. healing potions, coins of certain sort, etc.)
  3. This depends on game system, but for D&D 5e:
    1. Your "Personality traits" are now your "Flaws", and vice versa
    2. Your "Bonds" are now your "Ideals", and vice versa
  4. Drop three dice on the character sheet. Draw straight lines between the dice, forming a triangle. All words and numbers inside the triangle (even words that may have been cut-off and split into new ones) are highly sought after by the character; at least once per day one of these words must be found or encountered in some way, or the character dies on the spot. When found or encountered, cross it over on the character sheet
  5. Take a blank character sheet, randomly choose another player in the group, and copy their sheet. Congratulations, you're clone now (although the character's voice will be slightly pitched up)
  6. You turn into a beetle. Cicely will sigh, and then ignore the rest of the characters, as she starts packing up her things, getting ready to leave yet again. The beetle will join the other bugs, and follow Cicely wherever she goes.

Dec 2, 2020

Château Vampyr


My daughter provided this list of possible names for a vampire:

  1. Vampyro
  2. Läsko
  3. Blodtörstiga Köttfärssåsskallen
  4. von Blodkorven
  5. Huggtandsmackan
  6. Korvmackan