Jan 20, 2020

Instead of starting in a tavern maybe just do Marvel Zombies

...where the players are infected zombies with superhuman powers and super hunger for human flesh and they just try to infect as much as possible - across the planes.


Jan 4, 2020

Pouch Pals


Pouch Pals always comes in pairs. They keep small pouches dangling in strings from all over their body - but mostly wrapped around their fingers.

Their sour look may give the wrong impression, but they're usually non-hostile. They never speak, so all communication is done through hand waving, pointing, nodding, grunting, the usual stuff. Pouch Pals talk to each other only through stares.

Their pouches contain all sorts of things - 50% magically in one way another, i.e. powder that summons piglets, conjures burning goat heads, very fast snails, or just goes POFF and that's it with the neighbourhood. If not magical, it will most likely be some kind of spice - cinnamon or allspice are popular.

They are not believed to be of the living, or even human.

Gamable quotes from my daughter


”This sucks out bad dreams from your brain, and turns it into food.”

”Daddy, once there was a troll, and he sneezed a forest.”

"There are Big-Kings, Middle-Kings and Little-Kings. Middle-Kings are the size of a puppy."

"I ALWAYS WANT TO BITE, BECAUSE I AM AN OLD KING"

Dec 9, 2019

PuterPlane: Running Server

Running Server

  • Kangaroo-sized
    • But moves like an ostrich
  • Head is tablet
    • Weapon; display one random file from its hard drive:
      1. PAGEFILE.SYS
        • Attacker is confused for one round
        • But reveals information about running processes (+3 bonus against this Running Server) 
      2. TWAIN.DLL
        • Save vs. Scan. If fail, Running Server has a visual copy of attacker and may print out clones that will defend it
      3. C:\WINDOWS\FONTS\WINGDING.TTF
        •  Save vs. Tinfoil Hat (or Deciphering), or stand useless for 2 rounds trying to make sense of the symbols
  • Tail is power chord
    • Must recharge once per day for at least 2 hours
      • Running Servers that go without power start losing information at the rate of 1 file/hour
      • Information hungry, will hunt and devour interesting things if re-powered and memory was lost
  • Chicken legs
  • Type of pack animal
    • Domesticated by Binary Herders in server farms

Oct 26, 2019

The Compleat Spell Book of Metals

THE BAD IN EACH OTHER
Turns the caster and whoever she is conversing with at the moment into best friends, for the rest of the afternoon. They will feel all "IT'S US AGAINST THE WORLD MAN!".

For any outsider, they will just look like two drunks.


GRAVEYARD
Old nursery rhyme. Reverses life status for all those in range equal to caster's level measured in some nice way that makes it turn into a circle like radius thing found in old books about mathematics. In other words - all living humans caught in the radius fall down dead, while their soul seeks out the nearest dead body found in the ground in the same radius, and if found, possess it, raising it from the grave. If no dead body is found, the soul turns into a wight and will haunt the place for the rest of the afternoon.


CAUGHT A LONG WIND
Only deceased wizards are able to cast this spell, right after their last breath. It's basically a fart made up of all spell residue that slips out. It will travel the countryside for a whole afternoon before disappearing.


HOW COME YOU NEVER GO THERE
Truth spell; target will speak truthfully about why she never visits a specific place. If place asked about is unknown, target will get up instantly to seek out a similar place for the rest of the afternoon.


A COMMOTION
Cast upon any inanimate object, and it will start communicating (to the best of its ability). It will not answer questions - you've basically giving something that cannot communicate the ability to do so, and man does it want to tell you about really important things right now!

(Most scholars are certain this spell is misspelled, or a short form for "a communicative motion".)

It will do this for the rest of the afternoon.


THE CIRCLE MARRIED THE LINE
Positions the sun at horizon line, making it instantly sunrise or sunset (determined randomly by the GM by counting the number of birds outside her window). This phenomenon will last for what feels like an afternoon, after which the sun will return to its previous position.


BITTERSWEET MELODIES
Cast upon any wizard, and that wizard's spells will all have pros and cons for the rest of the afternoon. That is, for instance, if a healing spell is cast by that said wizard, it will have some negative effect as well (and vice versa), proportionally to the level of spell just cast.


ANTI-PIONEER
Depending on caster's level, may make a whole town pack it all up, reversing "civilization", giving back the earth to Mother Nature, so to speak. Houses will be carefully taken down, plank by plank; roads will be undug; everything must be restored to "before".

If cast on something not "civilized", several earth golems will rise, starting to undo what Mother Nature has done to this little patch of the forest (or glade), turning it back another thousand years.

If cast in the afternoon, nothing special will happen.

If cast on an afternoon, it turns into lunch.


UNDISCOVERED FIRST
A narrow tower rises from the ground - or water! or lava! or whatever! - climbing, climbing towards the sky, rumbling like madmen beating a thousand drums just enough off-beat, causing a shadow blacker than a dark night in the middle of the universe, to be cast like a pillar itself onto the ground, and anyone caught within that horrific dark shade, will instantly forget whatever first thought they had that day!

(It's a really cumbersome spell just to have people forget things. Most scholars nowadays agree that this spell is overly complicated, not to mention all those tall, narrow towers that get left behind here and there, loitering the countryside like a giant's used toothpicks. And besides, the effect only lasts for an afternoon.)


CICADAS AND GULLS
It's a fly spell, basically, but with an additional side effect that is permant (roll to randomly determine):

  1. Caster's eyes grow further apart
  2. Caster can't lower her voice
  3. Caster gains a small, transparent wing, anywhere
  4. Caster gains a feathered wing, anywhere
  5. Caster's mouth turns into a beak
  6. Caster shrinks to half size

If cast in the afternoon, the flying wizard will always spot a ongoing conflict from her view above.


COMFORT ME
Cast upon any caster to make her healing spells turn targets into bitter enemies, making them not wanting any more help from that caster until the next afternoon.


GET IT WRONG, GET IT RIGHT
A two-split spell. When cast, the wizard determines if the target will get her next thing right or wrong, whatever endevour that may be, large as small, but the endevour must be taking place the coming afternoon.


WOE BE
Makes the target fall in love with a bard. The bard will return this love only in letters, ending each with "Meet me by <SOME PLACE OFF BUT NOT TOO REMOTELY> this afternoon, dearest! This time surely I will come!"