Licker ghost

A licker ghost is a materialised ghost that casually walks around dungeon halls, picking up things at random, and licking them.

Their gait is pretty much like that of Liam Gallagher, a famous bard who may or may not exist in your home campaign.

It's not hostile but will scoff at anyone trying to get in its way - in its own, strange language.

Their tongue - extra stretchy - is actually not part of the licker ghost. In fact, large, parasitic slugs of various kinds have been known to take residence inside the ghost, as a mean to travel around the dungeon quicker. Most of these slugs are poisonous to various degrees, so try to not get licked at.

Some scholars claim that in certain extreme cases, the mouth of a licker ghost is actually a dimensional portal, and the "tongue" is the limb of an horrendous entity located at the far corners of space, where all light have gone out, and fleets of untold horrors are searching for a new home.

On the other hand, why would one believe scholars studying a ghost that walks like Liam Gallagher?

 

 

 

Well of Future Skydropped Things

Somewhere in a forest, in the middle of a ring of mossy stones, there's a crudely built well, in which people have been dropping things for centuries.

Staring into the well you'll only be greeted by darkness.

For it is not a normal well, but rather a hole into the undetermined future.

When you drop something into the well, it will disappear into the darkness - only to be dropped on you from high above in the next 3d6 days.

It will land 1d6-1 meters from your current position (e.g. zero means ON you).

The well is roughly one meter across.

Jumping into the well yourself will mean one of several things:

• Worst case: you'll die of starvation before reappearing in reality again
• Best case: you'll drop from high above the next day, hopefully NOT landing on any rock
• Not worst case but not best either: you'll drop the next day, but drop zero meters from yourself, resulting in you falling into the well AGAIN

Spells are fish and caught in the Sea of Opportunity

When a spell is cast and thus exhausted - wherever, whenever - it materializes as a fish in the great Sea of Opportunity.

It's a pretty big sea, probably the size of Vänern.

When a wizard needs to learn new spells, she needs to go fishing in the Sea of Opportunity.

The wizard's staff serves as a fishing rod. All they need to is to tie a line to it; the quality of the line determines the level of the spell.

All fishing wizards are grumpy.

 

 

You are what you eat, and potions are what they say

Potions of invisibility are invisible.

Potions of flying needs to be kept on a leash.

Potions of diminution are really tiny.

Potions of giant strength are REALLY hard to open, dammit!

Potions of invulnerability are impossible to break.

Potions of polymorph (self) looks like a hippopotamus.

My daughter illustrated some potions!

Lonely robot

 

Chill dudes

 

Plum horror

They are very tasty.

Hey Peter Hook, you fucking spam bot, I made you a post to like

 

Hey Blog admin

You are good writing skills

Please keep writing

and follow the below mention links

It is almost like poetry, so I guess a Peter Hook (as an encounter) is capable of casting bard-like spells.

Maybe there should be like a ”Stat up your own annoying spambot Peter Hook monster” blog carnival week next week? If you do, feel free to comment below with your blog link so we all can share my frustration with fucking spambot Peter Hook!

The oracle that knows a guy that actually knows the answer

Oracles always seem to know stuff, but give so vague answers, you just leave them wishing you'd punch them instead.

So instead of having the oracle give open-ended answers, make them always answer with a name of someone who knows.

And not like, "Oh you wish to know where the lost treasures of the reptilian conquerors are? You should ask a man with a hat about that", but rather, "Oh you wish to know where the lost treasures of the reptilian conquerors are? You should ask Johann van der Bajskorv the Third."

This person MUST know the answer, otherwise this whole thing falls apart. But there's nothing saying that they are willing to tell the answer, or are even alive.

And remember: these oracles always just answers with specific names, e.g. not where they are. That requires another question - which will be answered with...another name.

"But where can we find Johann van der Bajskorv the Third?"

"Oh you wish to know where to find Johann van der Bajskorv the Third? You should ask Little Unwin Binwin Simsalabim."

And so on.

Try it! I haven't!

Classic painting of Johann van der Bajskorv the Third, sporting his ermine short fur coat,
and hanging around his neck, "an ultra-magic" necklace (his own words).

Plate 28 from "A celestial atlas" as a generic die drop table

Source: Wikipedia

Print out the above on a oversized paper, and drop dice on it to create a random encounter.

E.g. drop three die and use one to determine the monster/creature, one to determine weapon, and the last to determine weakness/weak spot on body.

Or instead of dice: put it on the wall and throw dart! Or dip your dice in paint and throw those instead on the wall.

Anyway, you could put a meaning to different dice and drop those on the atlas above and interpret the results and be very happy according to this table:

1d4: Major feature of monster (e.g. drops on wing = flight)

1d6: Minor feature of monster

1d8: Weakness

1d10: Desire/motivation

1d12: Number of lines touching underneath = hit die

1d20: Last kill was this

And - AND! - the creature's reaction towards the party is based on the total number of even/odd dice; more even dice = happy creature, more odd = not happy.